By
Updated 7 months ago,September 27, 2024
Should you break up with your boyfriend/girlfriend?
Here are 10 signs you should break up with your boyfriend/girlfriend from dating expert Sabrina Alexis.
A breakup can feel almost like a death.
DeMorris Byrd
Its the death of the potential of what could have been.
Also, who really wants to start all over again?
And there is a big price to pay for this.
you’ve got the option to never recycle wasted time.
When its gone, its gone.
How many of your years are you willing to squander?
There is also a big cost to your self-esteem.
Being in a bad relationship can wear away at you and turn you into someone you barely recognize.
You know youre unhappy, but you take a stab at convince yourself otherwise because it just seems easier.
One of the most important relationship skills is knowing when to walk away.
Knowing when its not right.
So lets look at some of the biggest signs the relationship is done and you should break up.
Youre holding onto the good memories.
Youre not living in the present.
Youre living in the past and holding onto the memories of how great things used to be.
Nevermind the fact that things havent been good in a very long time.
You know things could be good because theyweregood.
But how long will you hang onto these memories?
When do you accept that the shiny past no longer exists and all you have is a gloomy present?
You dont like yourself.
This is one of the biggest signs that this relationship isnt working.
Bad relationships have a way of turning us into bad versions of ourselves, into theworstversions of ourselves.
You cant remember the last time you smiled genuinely or felt genuinely happy.
You know this isnt you.
This unhappy, uninspired, miserable person is a shadow of your former self.
So why do you stay?
Because of how much you likehim.
Or how much you think you like him.
A good relationship usually brings out our best.
We feel loved for who we are and this is invigorating and encourages our true selves to shine.
Bad relationships do exactly the opposite.
So forget about your feelings for him, ask yourself how you feel aboutyou.
He isnt trying to make it work.
In order for a relationship to work, two people need to be committed to making it work.
One person cant carry the team.
They need love, attention, and nourishment or theyll wither and die.
If he isnt willing to put anything in, then there isnt much to hold onto.
Being around your partner doesnt feel good anymore and it hasnt for a long time.
You dont feel uplifted, excited, or inspired.
You feel like youve been through an emotional war.
You feel drained and exhausted like you have nothing left to give.
You know the feeling.
Thats that feeling of utter hopelessness and despair because no amount of trying seems to get you anywhere.
You are both full of resentment.
Resentment is absolute poison for a relationship.
A buildup of a resentment is a strong sign that communication has fully broken down.
What stops you from hearing it is a wall of resentment that has built up over time.
When arguments arise, which they do with increasing frequency, you fight dirty.
Fights are a chance to let all your aggression and resentment run wild and it all comes out.
Instead of trying to reach a resolution, an argument causes further dissolution.
Your friends and family think you should break up.
Your close friends and family usually know the truth.
Now the question is how willing are you to listen to what they have to say?
I was in a horriblytoxic relationshipyears ago and not one person in my life approved of him.
They didnt care that I was in love and that I claimed he made me happy.
They saw how bad he was for me because they had something I didnt: objectivity.
You may find you dont tell the truth about your relationship to anyone.
And if anyone says something even slightly negative about your relationship, you get disproportionately defensive.
Thats because the truth hits us harder than any misconception.
You feel like youre walking on eggshells.
You cant just relax and justbe.
Youre always anxious and on edge.
Your relationship feels like a minefield.
A step in the wrong direction and here comes the explosion.
So you tiptoe around the house trying not to make a sound.
Youre afraid to do or say almost anything because everything turns into a fight.
You feel physically ill most of the time.
Youre settling for what you dont want.
This is one of the most common scenarios.
You cling tightly to as soon as…
This ties into the previous point.
You arent living in the present, you are living in some idyllic future.
The only thing really keeping you in the relationship is the phrase As soon as.
You are totally incompatible.
I dont care how good the sex is, if you are incompatible, it will not work.
Love doesnt conquer all and it definitely doesnt conquer incompatibility, despite what romantic comedies would have you believe.
you better identify what it is you want and need in life.
What are your goals and values?
What is your vision for the future?
