Dont be afraid to ask someone what they’re looking for.
By
Updated 6 years ago,June 3, 2019
Bumble.
Dates that arent clearly defined as dates.
Yes, this is what dating has come to.
The rules of modern dating are as follows:
1.
Dont underestimate bad vibes.
Toa Heftiba
Last fall I went on a date with a hipster to Starbucks.
Side note: he ubered 40 minutes to get there.
We arrive at Starbucks, and he said oh so this is what Starbucks is .
Ive never been to one.
I already had bad vibes, all in the first 1 minute of meeting him.
Needless to say, we didnt hit it off.
We said goodbye and he ubered his way back home.
Even if he paid.
Even if he traveled to get to you.
This comes to appearance as well as personality.
Bumble provides us with a quick and convenient way to pass judgment.
We base who we talk to or meet up with solely on looks.
And Im not saying looks shouldnt be a factor.
But sometimes the not as hot guys are the keepers the ones you may actually fall for.
Dont be so quick to swipe left just because he looks a little nerdy.
He may be husband material.
Chivalry is NOT dead.
Dating may be temporarily dead, but chivalry is not.
Even if youre just hanging out.
Manners are manners, and they tell us so much about a person.
Stop pretending to be so chill…unless, you are in fact a chill person.
I unfortunately am not chill.
Ive reached the conclusion that if we act chill for too long, we eventually explode.
Dont just go with the hanging out thing if you want to date.
If you want a relationship, you dont have to listen to his we dont need a label speech.
), get the heck out of there.
Find what you want elsewhere.
And right along with that, if you want to go on a date, say it.
You dont have to do this whole casual thing if you dont want him.
Tell him you dont want to drink beer and chill.
You dont want to order in Taco Bell and enjoy some nice bro time.
Tell him you would like a gentleman, paired with a nice Italian dinner and some white wine.
Stop over-analyzing every single text he sends (or every single word in every single text).
This isnt Romeo and Juliet.
Theres not always a literary theme, and theres rarely a Christ figure.
Texting causes so many miscommunications and fights.
Dont read so far into what he texts you.
If something that he says bothers you, talk about it in person.
Dont read into it.
Just talk about it.
You dont have to time when you respond to his texts or Snapchat.
You dont have to play these games where you pretend you are in no rush to talk to him.
So what if you text him back in a minute?
So what if you open his snapchat a whole day later?
Set the scene for what you want in a relationship.
If you scare him away, hes not your guy.
Why do people think it is okay to just stop talking to someone or to ignore them?
This goes back to basic manners.
It is not so difficult to pick up the phone and tell someone youre not feeling.
This is a communication red flag so run while you’re able to.
Moral of the story: dont ghost.
ANd if you are ghosted?
Try not to feel too heartbroken.
There are red flags everywhere.
Dont be afraid to ask someone what theyre looking for.
If he never wants a relationship, and thats what youre looking for, listen to him.
Dont waste your time trying to change him.
You dont want to date someone for months on end never knowing if you are exclusive or a couple.
If he wants to be with you, he will take a stab at be with you.
You shouldnt feel like youre convincing someone to date you.
Youre a gold medal!
Find someone who wants this medal.
