Youre suddenly reading signals that might not even be there.
But real relationships dont require that of you.
Real relationships are simple.
God & Man
When you arent used to any of those things, it throws you off finally meeting a good man.
He tells you how you feel and you dont believe him.
It isnt that you dont trust him.
He hasnt done anything to you.
The sex is completely different.
And when you devalue sex in relationships regardless of how the relationship is defined, the experience changes.
Theres a wall you put up subconsciously to protect yourself.
You feel guilty for needing validation.
Doubts cross your mind still.
And its okay to need validation.
Needing certain things in a relationship doesnt mean you are asking too much.
Wanting to be confident in someone doesnt make you weak.
Youre so unbelievably guarded.
Its okay to be scared.
We value the things we want but have never had before.
And sometimes weve settling hoping we could change how someone feels about us.
Hoping we could change the relationship.
If an almost relationship taught you anything its the importance of valuing something real when you find it.
You worry entirely too much.
Then realize you dont have to.
Where you once used to analyze every move you made and every mixed signal.
Where social media acted as some pawn in this game, you realize how simple it should have been.
Because the right guy answers your texts quickly.
The right guy keeps his word.
The right guy adds confidence to the doubt you might have in yourself or him.
You are constantly waiting for something to suddenly change.
You watch him closely analyzing everything.
Maybe after the sex, the slow fade will become a reality.
Maybe as time and distance separate you too suddenly his feelings will change.
Maybe hell just stop answering like so many have before.
You anticipate the worst because you want to manage your expectations and not be let down.
But he hasnt disappointed you or let you down or given you any indication that you cant trust him.
And you swear this is too good to be true.
You think just because you havent had this before you dont deserve it.
And it was eventually going to happen for you.
You invested a lot into others who didnt deserve you now its time you experience someone who does.
You push him away when he gets too close.
Suddenly your walls completely crumble at his touch and it scares the shit out of you.
Suddenly youre telling him things you havent even said out loud.
And he doesnt take off running like you expect he just holds you close and you feel safe.
Something simple and honest throws you off.
It gets to a point your ears grow mute.
But this is different because heres someone who hasnt deceived you or lied to you or led you on.
You suddenly become more confident in him.
You forgot what it was like to be confident in someone.
But this time its different.
You start to end other lingering relationships for good.
You feel guilty playing the comparison game.
Its normal to compare someone you might have known for a while.
Almost relationships establish an emotional connection you cant deny is there.
You get to know someone at a very deep level.
And you sometimes fall in love with these people knowing very well nothing will come of these feelings.
Take their best qualities.
Use that as a standard.
But then you realize he blows everyone away.
He teaches you what love and a healthy relationship actually is.
Something that left you empty.
