By
Updated 7 years ago,November 19, 2017
1.
If your mom is toxic, there should be no guilt.
If your mom is toxic, there should be no guilt about maintaining your own boundaries.
Mario Azzi
emilydm
2.
Being your mother doesnt get her a pass to make you miserable.
Being your mother doesnt get her a pass to make you miserable.
Mario Azzi
Side noteI initially read the question as you asking if its OK to punch your mom.
Just in case you were curious, that ones a no.
SexualBreakfast
3.
I just cut ties with my mom after a long history of putting up with un-mom-like behavior.
usernameismyrealname
4.
If your mom is a toxic person, of course its okay.
Having a narcissistic mom myself, I can understand where youre coming from.
That toxic behavior cost me friendships and close contact with relatives.
MADDOGCA
5.
Im so much better without that darkness in my life.
My mother was abusive and manipulative, especially when I got out of college.
She sent pictures of my things I had left behind in her home and said she sold them.
She showed me pictures of gifts I had given her over the years smashed to bits.
UCMCoyote
6.
Blood relation is not a pass to be a shitty person or reason to tolerate.
Blood relation is not a pass to be a shitty person or reason to tolerate.
Family does not automatically mean love, but love can mean family.
Live life for you, not how you think others feel you should.
TheSygil
7. you better take care of yourself first.
Ever been on an airplane?
Their safety speech before they break out the liquor.
Always put your own oxygen mask on before assisting other passengers.
you gotta take care of yourself first.
Lips902
8.
Toxic people are toxic people.
Its hard buttoxic people are toxic people, no matter who they are to you.
oceantyp3
9.
Dasrufken
10.
My mother was and still is a nasty and abusive woman who I dont want anything to do with.
My mother was and still is a nasty and abusive woman who I dont want anything to do with.
Just because she is your mother doesnt make her a good person.
Those people were probably lucky enough to have a decent human being as a mother.
Iampissedoffaswell
11.
One of the best parts of being an adult is getting to decide who gets your energy.
One of the best parts of being an adult is getting to decide who gets your energy.
Ive been no contact with my borderline mother for 2 1/2 years.
Its not always easy but it has ABSOLUTELY been for the best.
FoodYarnNerd
12.
Because she conceived you doesnt mean she gets to destroy you.
Because she conceived you doesnt mean she gets to destroy you.
You wouldnt let anyone else walk over you.
Why let someone that should be nurturing do it?
nineoeight
13.
Mine is addicted to opioids.
Mine is addicted to opioids.
After years of taking care of her shit, I cut ties.
There is no reason for a kid at 19 to be taking care of his 40-year-old mom.
adirtygerman
14.
You dont have to validate cutting your mother out of your life to anyone else.
Im a 24-year-old gay man that has cut his entire mothers side out.
Blood is thicker than water, OP.
Its another family inviting you to their holidays and making your favorite dish.
Its other mothers calling you son (or daughter), and thats okay to accept.
OP, my dear, dear kindred soul, you had no say in your birth or childhood.
This is ourone shot at life.
Make it a good one.
I like to think thats what any mother would ultimately want.
I am so with you, my dear kindred soul.
I will never meet you in this 7bn+ world of ours.
But I am rooting you on at every challenge you meet.
You have so absolutely got this.
FrancoManiac
15.
Not having a terrible mother is far more important than having a good mother.
Not having a terrible mother is far more important than having a good mother.
4152510
16.
I had to do it with my mom.
She was extremelyverbally abusivetoward me growing up.
Its hard for me to admit, but that was probably the best decision Ive ever made.
The point is, its okay to choose your sanity over your relationship with her.
MoosesMom7
17.
My mental health has been a lot better and Im no longer constantly living in fear.
i_belong_to_da_ocean
18.
Mom liked drugs more than being a mom.
I pushed mine out a few years back.
She had (has) mental health issues that she has either ignored, self-medicated for, etc.
since I was a child.
He had pushed for full/joint custody long before this and was denied, but I digress.
So she gets weekend visitation unsupervised with us and more shady stuff happens.
She stops showing up for visits more and more until she stops completely.
For almost a decade I didnt know if she was alive or not.
Finally I prove to be too much of a problem child and Im sent to live with her.
Her response was that obviously I still had some issues and I should just move on like she did.
That tore it, I was done.
TL;DR: mom liked drugs more than being a mom.
EraserParticles
19.
Just because someone pushed you out of their body doesnt mean they are your family.
Just because someone pushed you out of their body doesnt mean they are your family.
If your mother is a toxic or hateful person, then its acceptable to go low or no contact.
Sometimes its just who they are and your life will be better.
Sometimes cutting off a family member whose toxicity and negative impact actually helps them get over their shit.
Sometimes it doesnt fix a thing with that person.
But what it does mean is their bullshit is not your bullshit anymore.
no more having to deal with a drunk parent wanting a ride for smokes at 2am).
People whove only known good relationships or are used to dysfunctional relationships will attempt to play the family card.
But family is more than blood relationship.
We make our own families.
Sometimes its blood ties.
Sometimes its love ties.
Sometimes its ties of friendship and respect.
NeedsToShutUp
20.
As someone whose mother is currently incarcerated formolesting meas a child, yes, yes it is.
This is the gist of what my grandma, my moms mom, has said to me many times.
It used to make me feel guilt, but you know what?
Bubba3401
21.
She went completely off the deep end at my wedding, booing my wife and I.
She destroyed her bouquet and said we gave her a lesser one.
Crashed the bridal partys spa appointment to get hair and makeup done.
When we were announced at the reception, she booed.
If there was anything she could do that was destructive, she did it.
I havent spoken to her much since, and not at all in the last fifteen years.
Im sure my life is better off for it.
monorail_pilot
22.
Blood does not mean you have to keep someone around.
You ALWAYS come first.
DiomaNoir
23.
Both my wife and I have shit mothers.
High school graduation, drunk, college graduation, drunk, wedding, drunk.
I have since pushed her out of my life and could not be happier.
axelrage
24.
I pushed both my parents out of my life almost 10 years ago.
I pushed both my parents out of my life almost 10 years ago.
One word of advice: Some people have a strong social need.
throwaway845731
25.
Giving birth to someone doesnt excuse bad behavior toward them.
Parents are people and they are not a different species from other humans.
