1.Im a hoe?!
Youre easier to get into than a community college.
2.Copernicus called, turns out yourenotthe center of the universe.
Sarah Noltner
3.I always hear punch me in the face when youre speaking, but its usually subtext.
5.If you were a spice, youd be flour.
6.Dont talk out loud.
You lower the IQ of the whole street.
7.I dont like you.
I dont hate you.
8.Sometimes I wish you were smarter so that you would know how dumb you really are.
9.Somewhere out there there is a tree, tirelessly producing oxygen so you’re able to breathe.
I think you owe it an apology.
10.Im not questioning your honor.
Im denying its existence.
11.Your secret is safe with my indifference.
12.You must have been born on the highway, because thats where most accidents happen.
14.If you were a trophy at the end of a race, Id walk backwards.
16.You know what you are?
A beard with an idiot hanging off it.
17.You couldnt drain the contents of a boot if the directions were written on the heel.
18.Are you even in the vicinity of a point?
19.It gives me a headache just trying to think down to your level.
20.Im more woman than youll ever get, and more man than youll ever be.
If I wanted you to speak, Ill wave a Snausage over your nose.
22.I swear you were born out your mammas asshole because her pussy was too busy.
23.Anybody who told you to just be yourself couldnt have given you worse advice.
24.If people actually knew how smart I was, it would be harder to control them.
26.Just because youve got the emotional range of a teaspoon doesnt mean we all have.
27.I thought I smelled cookies wafting from the ovens of the little elves that live in your hair.
28.You have the moral backbone of a chocolate eclair.
29.The jerk store called and theyre running out ofyou!
30.I see the muscle shirt came today, muscles coming tomorrow?
