“We were planning a threesome as a surprise for you and decided to test it first.”
2.I didnt tell you about this because I was worried you would get upset.
3.There is a fucking hickey on your neck?
30 Dumbass Excuses From Cheating Partners, As Told By The Women Who Were Cheated On
Oh, I did that shaving.
And you expect me to buy that bullshit?
4.We were planning a threesome as a surprise for you and decided to test it first.
He knew I wasnt into other girls…
But boy, he was.
I had my earrings in.
Im SO sorry this has been such an emotional toll on YOU.
8.But you were at Disneyland!
You could have cheated on me there!
I went with my mom and aunt.
9.I knew you werent ready to pop pop the relationship so I didnt tell you about it.
10.I wanted to see what our future was like.
She was an older, less attractive version of you.
11.Its not cheating because I was already planning to break up with you.
Featured in them was the tattoo he got on our second date.
14.She reminded me of a younger version of you, and the way you used to be.
I was 20, he was 25, wed been dating since I was 18.
I went to college.
I was gone for five days.
His father, a pastor, called and said the same thing.
16.My friend made the tinder account for me.
I swear I didnt even use it or talk to anyone!
His best friend didnt care and said, I know shes a hoe anyway.
I was like the only sane person in the entire situation.
19.Well, I asked you if I could sleep with her!
You said no, what was I supposed to do?
Umm…
20.Other men flirt with you.
Yes, and I didnt flirt back.
You slept with another woman.
This chick claimed she had a yeast infection and hestillwanted to bang her.
You should get some condoms because if she gets a yeast infection, shell know whats up.
22.He was in his early 50s, I was in my early 20s.
He said the age difference was too much and he wanted a more normal relationship.
The other girl was 17.
23.My parents are getting divorced so I dont know what a healthy relationship looks like
He was 25.
24.She had her pussy out.
So was I but okay.
26.My cheating ex tried to say Id given them permission to sleep with our mutual friend.
27.You have been working so much that I got lonely.
Yeah, I am working two jobs because your dumb ass is unemployed and there are bills to pay.
He made it seem like some sort of disassociation trip.
I love when they have a go at make you feel guilty for their cheating.
(Emotional affair) Shes a marriage counselor.
Because he wouldnt go to actual marriage counseling when I insisted.
Oh boy, so cheating on me with someone with the shittiest ethics ever!
Be happy together, fuckers.
