If he isnt ready to be in a serious relationship, then things wont work out.
Is your man truly mature enough to be in such a relationship?
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Updated 8 years ago,September 13, 2017
What is a serious relationship?
Tanja Heffner
So what exactly would an unserious relationship be?
Its a relationship that has a shaky foundation.
Its one in which things get a bit dicey.
Tanja Heffner
At least one person in the relationship thinks of it as insignificant.
The tricky part is that not everyone agrees on what serious means.
For some, having sex is enough of a qualifier.
Thats the case for me.
But that isnt what some people mean when they talk about getting serious, is it?
For many people, a serious relationship is all-encompassing: Its romantic, emotional and sexual.
But when the relationship is purely physical, its not really a relationship at all.
Which, again, is funny, because even a sexual relationship has physical and psychological effects.
(OK, maybe funny isnt the best word.)
But how do you know if the person youre dating is the right person for your serious relationship?
Of course, nothing is certain, but that doesnt mean you shouldnt still try for the winning horse.
Where do you see this going?
If your relationship is at the point of getting serious, its best to knowhow serious.
If youre with a guy, dont ask him if he plans to put a ring on it.
attempt to be stealthy.
Figure out if he actually wants things to get more serious.
If youre dropping hints and hes responding positively, he might just be trying not to hurt your feelings.
Im not saying this is necessarily the case, but it might be.
Either way, its good to know where your boyfriend stands and where he hopes things may eventually lead.
And if thats not something hes open to discussing, you have your answer.
Whats your 10-year plan?
Or, if thats too big, Whats your five-year plan?
You dont even have to be asking about the relationship.
This is about finding out more about your boyfriends goals.
What does he want to do in five years?
Where does he want to be?
Does he plan on staying where he is or moving sometime in the next five years?
you oughta figure this stuff out early on in the relationship.
Just because you want to get serious doesnt mean you should.
Asking these questions even if theyre hard is often the only way to find out the truth.
How much do you care about me?
Hopefully you already know the answer to this one.
To be honest, this is a question that Id recommend you ask indirectly.
Thatll tell you more than any question ever could.
If he treats you poorly, then he doesnt care for you.
Even if he says he treats you well, the evidence is right in front of you.
At the very least, he doesnt treat you well enough.
But if he treats you with respect and gentleness, then you know that his feelings are sincere.
Are you ready to get serious?
And dont just rely on what he says.
Again, this is another instance in which actions speak louder than words.
