Are you making choices that feel good?
Are you feeling loved and supported in your relationship?
Did you make someone smile today?
Naomi August
Is your foundation strong?
Did you do something recently that got your adrenaline pumping?
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Updated 8 years ago,September 29, 2017
Being unhappy is horrible.
It can take over your life and suck all that is good and joyful out of it.
None of us wants to be unhappy, but many of us are.
One thing many of us dont ask ourselves is why we are unhappy.
Naomi August
In an effort to help you identify what specifically is making you unhappy I have five questions for you.
Answer them in terms of your own life and you will get the answers you are looking for.
#1Are you proud of the choices you are making?
Do you know what your guiding principles are, and are you living them?
I have a client who was having an affair with a married man.
He made her deliriously happy, or so she told herself.
But still she didnt feel good about her life and she didnt know why.
I asked her what her guiding principles werewhat was most important to her in a relationship?
After some thought and discussion she realized that the truth was of paramount importance to her.
And that nothing about her relationship with the married man was based on truth.
Are you able to live with that?
#2Is your relationship making your heart sing?
Our romantic relationships are very important, more important than many of us recognize.
But this just simply is not true.
When we have those things our lives are fuller, we are satisfied, and we are loved.
Other things can bring us down, but the foundation of a good relationship helps us when we founder.
I have a client whose husband was always one of two things: absent or drunk.
She wasnt sure which was worsehis not being in the house or being drunk when he was.
What she did know was that it was making her miserable.
She was always hoping that things would change, but they never did.
She was alone in her marriage.
And the rest of her life?
What did she do?
#3Do you make a difference in the world?
I know you are going to say that you just dont have time to volunteer.
How could I possibly ask you to do that?
I am not going to ask you to do that.
Although if it appeals you should try it.
Volunteering makes the world go round.
What I mean by making a difference is asking you how you interact with others in the world.
Did you smile at the checkout person at the grocery store?
Do you hold doors for other people?
Do you refrain from giving the finger to the man who cut you off in his BMW?
Do you pick up trash that you see in the street?
The act of smiling at someone will actually make you and the person you smiled at happier.
Holding doors for people makes them feel noticed, and you made it happen.
And picking up that trash will literally make the world a more beautiful place.
So make a difference in the world every day.
It will make you happier.
#4Do you feel healthy and strong?
Taking care of yourself is the key to a foundation from which happiness can grow.
Eat well, but dont deprive yourself.
Exercise, but only so it makes you feel good.
Do one thing that makes you happy every day, like a massage or lunch with a friend.
Find a life coach to get the support that you need.
If you feel healthy and strong, you will be able to take on whatever life throws at you.
Wouldnt that feel great?
#5Do you challenge yourself?
I know that I have my routines.
Pretty much every day.
Challenging yourself will keep your brain going strong, keep you physically confident and get that adrenaline rushing.
What do I mean by being challenged?
It can be anything.
When I got divorced I promised myself that I would start doing all of the things that scared me.
Except for a drill.
Its so hard to imagine now not being able to do those things.
And did I mention that I was way smarter?
That makes me happy.
Unhappiness to so many of us is the status quo.
We assume that this is the way life is, and we must push through it.
But it doesnt have to be this way.
If not, choose one and make it happen.
Happiness is yours for the taking.
