Narcissists have the unique ability to covertly operate in their disorder without your knowledge.
They temporarily make you the most important person in the world
Imagine being a giant among men.
Imagine that your colossal footprint dwarfs anyone who dares walk near you.
Ian Espinosa
How can you find a suitable mate if you find it difficult to identify anyone who matches your greatness?
It can be quite frustrating!
Your temporary ascendancy is sanctioned because the narcissist has chosen you and preordained you as a suitable companion.
The narcissists choice of adjectives when speaking of you are always the most extreme superlatives.
You are the most beautiful person in the world or the most intelligent person theyve ever met.
Understand that this isnt about you.
You may not be mediocre, but to the narcissist, you are average at best.
The flattery you are receiving is designed to make you more palatable, not to affirm you.
The narcissist struggles with your inferiority and has to convince themselves that you are deserving of their affection.
Soon the veneration will cease and the celebration will be replaced with harsh and unfair critique.
Your level of importance will significantly diminish and your words and actions will be lambasted with unprecedented vitriol.
The narcissist will grow weary from attempting to inflate your status to meet their enormous ego.
The same holds true for the courage to display vulnerability.
Not so with the narcissist.
The narcissist uses vulnerability as a tool to garner sympathy and affirmation.
They understand your nature to nurture and will exploit your instincts to disarm you and lower your defenses.
Evidence of their successful campaign is that you will find yourself accepting implausible excuses for their unacceptable behavior.
Despite their self-obsession, they are aware of their flaws.
They need you to view them as an upgrade that exceeds all other competition for your heart.
They will boast, not just of their significant resources but their willingness to share those resources.
They will constantly remind you that you are fortunate to be with someone who gives so freely.
Their money is a competitive edge they use to obtain your loyalty and praise.
For the narcissist, this is a worthwhile investment because the dividend is a constantly stroked ego.
The challenge the narcissist faces is that most people dont view wealth as a necessary component of love.
This fact is problematic for the narcissist.
They need their wealth to be a major influencer of your desire for them.
They need to use their generosity to counter your claim that they are selfish and self-serving.
The narcissist requires your dependency to elicit your praise.
The narcissist does not long for you to want them; they demand that you need them.
They realize that desire is fluid but reliance is enduring.
An equitable relationship establishes an even playing field that causes extreme discomfort for the narcissist.
The narcissist cannot risk the perception of equality because it robs them of power and influence.
The narcissist believes that there can only be one winner, and that winner must be them!
The narcissist will manufacture conflict to create an environment for your subjugation.
They will berate you until you finally surrender and accept responsibility for an argument they instigated.
Soon, you will recognize that you are constantly apologizing and the narcissist is feigning humility while you capitulate.
Their proximity and knowledge of you pose perpetual threats to the narcissists ability to manipulate you.
The narcissist cannot afford to allow your social circle to damage your perception of them.
The narcissist would then have to accept that they are average or, worse, below average.
Their voice is the only voice you hear and the only voice you trust.
Soon, your voice is gone and the narcissist now speaks for you.
They control your thoughts and feelings.
They prompt you to question your needs and desires.
The narcissist has won.
Be careful of the narcissist.
Protect yourself from people who can only see themselves in a crowded room.
Be careful of those who elevate themselves without justification and tears down others without cause.
