There comes a time in everyones life when they are thinking about giving up on finding love.
And, even if they meet someone, that someone doesnt turn out to be the person for them.
Its exhausting, this dating game, and at times it seems hopeless.
Neemias Seara
But I am here to tell you that its not!
I know that they work.
I tried them and, 2 years in, I am living happily ever after!
Many people seek love and affirmation from an another person.
It is only through their lovers eyes that they can feel whole and happy.
Only in the company of their person can they feel strong and confident and worthy of love.
Who, may I ask, needs this kind of pressure?
Certainly not your person.
As a result, because we dont love and know ourselves, our relationships fail.
Take a good look at who you are in the world.
What your goals and values are.
Get to know the person you are outside of relationships.
Is there a part of that person who might need some attention?
Would understanding that part of yourself and helping that part heal feel good?
After my divorce, I worked hard on figuring out who I was.
I did lots of therapy, tons of yoga and took many long walks.
Ivolunteeredat a food shelter and learned the value of purpose and giving back.
I spent time alone, not always by choice, but I learned to really appreciate it.
And then, when I was ready, I started my own life-coaching business and began public speaking.
I renewed my sense of purpose and my self-confidence grew exponentially.
It was then that I met my guy.
Sometimes, an important part of finding true love is to stop looking for it.
Sometimes, the dogged pursuit of something only pushes it farther away.
Do you spend all of your free time thinking about your potential partner?
Do you spend hours swiping right and left and engaging in conversations that go nowhere?
Do you find yourself more often than not discouraged by your journey?
If this is the case, then perhaps its time to take a break and focus on something else.
Perhaps you might dig into your work a little deeper or volunteer somewhere and make a difference.
The benefits of giving yourself a break from dating are many.
If you are considering giving up on finding love, stop looking so hard.
Live your life a little.You will be glad you did.
Does yourdating profilecontain well defined specifics about what you want in a guy?
Do you have criteria about height, income, location, age and marital status?
Do you tend not to even consider people outside of those definitions?
How is that working out for you so far?
He was separated, living in NH, 5 years older than me and he had a mustache!!
Never in a million years would I have gone out with him.
Luckily, I met him IRL and connected with him immediately.
Give some people a chance who you might not have previously done so.
Do things differently and things might end up differently.
We can define what went wrong and figure out how to do things differently.
It took me 20 years of marriage and 5 years of post-divorce dating to figure this out.
Doing so will help you find the true love that you have always sought.
I believe that only if you have faith that something will happen does it happen.
I wrote a few paragraphs about what I wanted my love future to be.
I kept that love dream somewhere where I could read it often and I did.
Reading and rereading it gave me hope, even in dark times.
I found that love dream a few months ago, tucked away in a pile of papers.
Literally everything that I had envisioned for myself 5 years ago has come true.
So, dont give up.
Believe that your love is out there.
I know they are.
First and foremost, take a step back if you gotta and get to know and love yourself.
And, most importantly, dont give up.
Love is out there for you just you wait!
