There is nothing worse than a broken heart, and getting over someone isnt easy.
These thoughts can stop our broken heart recovery in its tracks.
So, what kind of toxic thoughts can sabotage getting over someone?
Joe Gardner
I am a total loser.
Breakups happen for many reasons, but usually its not because one person is a loser.
People are complicated and, at the beginning, that complication doesnt matter.
What matters is the chemistry, the connection, the attraction.
But once the relationship settles down, they can become complicated.
They have disagreements about just about everything, and some of them are fundamental to their personal beliefs.
And yet, when I suggest breaking up, my client shuts me down because he loves her.
Neither one of these people are losers.
If you dont believe me, go ask your friends!
I will never love or be loved again.
I am here to tell you that, if you are thinking these thoughts, they are patently untrue.
There is a big, wide world out there, and there is lots of love to be had.
Was he with his kids, skiing, working?
If we could just go back to the way we were in the beginning…
I am afraid to say, its impossible to go back to the beginning.
As I said above, the beginning of a relationship is amagical time.
The hope that the two of you have a wonderful future together is irresistible.
Unfortunately, the beginning just isnt sustainable.
It is a time when we are being our best selves and our chemicals rule.
Once the beginning turns into the middle, things change.
Peoples real selves begin to emerge.
Incompatibilities rear their ugly head.
Relationships then get complicated and they can fall apart.
The beginning is over, and what is happening now is how it will be going forward.
Someone else will get the best part of them.
I have a client who was with her beau for eight years.
Their first years were magical, but then he began to struggle with his business.
He became moody and depressed and spent more and more time away from home.
She has left him and is happily living her own life.
Recently, she saw her ex on Instagram with his new girlfriend.
She was immediately struck by how happy he looked.
She assured me that this new girl had fixed him and that they would live happily ever after.
So dont convince yourself that if your ex looks happy on social media that they are all fixed.
I can promise you that its just not true.
If I can change, I can get them back.
And while sometimes that works, more often than not, it doesnt.
I know that it seems impossible, but love is out there waiting for you.
Get yourself off the couch and go find it!
