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Updated 2 years ago,January 26, 2023
I knew something was wrong in my early 20s.
It was hard enough worrying about fitting in with the popular sorority girls in college.
Special dietary needs and digestive issues piled on added physical, emotional, and mental weight.
Allegra Messina
Decades later, I finally received a diagnosis.
Crohns Disease can occur in people of any age.
By simple definition, Crohns is an inflammatory bowel disease that causes chronic inflammation of the gastrointestinal tract.
Here are my top pieces of advice for successfully navigating dating and being social while living with Crohns.
Be honest and upfront about your needs.
Not only do you deserve the freedom to be yourself, others deserve to know who you truly are.
Everyone deserves to know the real you and you deserve a real relationship.
Use it as an opportunity to educate.
Embrace your uniqueness, most people dont know what they dont know.
Education drives compliance and acceptance.
Eat beforehand, bring your own food, and check the menu prior to your event.
This eliminates food issues completely.
Social functions and dates do not need to be centered around food or cocktails.
They should be centered around connection.
By preparing ahead of time, you alleviate the stress of the unknown.
Request to have your meals and cocktails crafted to your specific needs.
Most restaurants will cater to your needs.
Ask what oil and ingredients they use.
Read the ingredients in cocktails as well as your meals.
That look is not cute on anyone.
Be an unapologetic question-asker and boundary-setter.
If you dont ask questions, youll never know.
I struggled setting and standing by my boundaries when I was younger.
I felt I was apologizing for everything whether I needed to apologize or not.
Healthy boundaries are there to protect you.
Dont apologize for special needs, non-negotiables, and protecting your energy.
Maybe you require more alone time or maybe you dont feel like going out.
Own your boundaries or people will continue to step over the line.
Be a realistic relentless optimist.
Accept the facts but choose to always look for the silver linings.
Most would prefer to be around people who radiate joy and positivity.
I choose to be one of those people and bring the sunshine more than the rain.
