You’re so ugly, you couldn’t even arouse suspicion.
1.If you were a spice, youd be flour.
2.Youre so ugly, you couldnt even arouse suspicion.
Madison Compton
3.Youre like the first slice of bread in the packet, everyone touches you but no one wants you.
4.Youre as sharp as a rubber ball.
5.Me: Singing along to Fleetwood Mac.
Friend: Who sings this?
Me: Fleetwood Mac.
7.Here, I gift you this plant to carry around with you.
To make up for all the oxygen you waste.
8.You look like a video game character whose face hasnt loaded all the way yet.
9.So, I was listening to this couple argue.
10.David Letterman: Im not as dumb as I look
Tina Fey: How could you be?
11.You have the moral backbone of a chocolate eclair.
12.That guy couldnt score in a brothel.
13.You may not be the dumbest person on Earth, but you better hope he doesnt die.
15.You seem to be suffering from delusions of adequacy.
16.Youre not that pretty to be this stupid.
17.Of course I didnt come here to insult you I dont need to be NEAR you to insult you.
18.You are the load your mom should have swallowed.
19.Its impossible to underestimate you.
20.Your birth certificate is an apology letter from the condom factory.
21.I envy everyone who hasnt met you.
22.It smells like something is burning, ___ are you trying to think again?
23.If you had two brains you would be twice as stupid.
24.If ugly was a day, youd be a month.
25.You wanna sex-related joke?
Look in a mirror.
26.Youre the reason why tubes of toothpaste have instructions on them.
27.If he was any more inbred, hed be a sandwich.
28.Your secret is safe with my indifference.
29.Next time you cross the road, dont bother looking.
30.If laughter is medicine, your face must be curing the world.
31.I dont have the time or the crayons to explain this to you.
32.Somewhere out there is a tree tirelessly producing oxygen so you might breathe.
I think you owe it an apology.
33.I had a wet dream about you.
35.If brains were dynamite, you wouldnt have enough to blow your nose.
36.This squid is so raw I can still hear it telling SpongeBob to fuck off.
37.Youd struggle to pour water out of a boot with instructions on the heel.
38.I hope your day is just as pleasant as you are.
39.Does your ass ever get jealous of all the crap that comes out of your mouth.
41.When Chevy Chase hosted SNL during season 2, he got into a fight with Bill Murray.
42.One of the two of us is dumber than me.
43.You continue to meet my expectations.
44.Climb back in your mum and cook a little longer.
45.I dont know what your problem is, but Ill bet its really hard to pronounce.
46.Youre as useful as Anne Franks drum kit.
48.If you gave him an enema, you could bury whats left of him in a matchbox.
49.In a dumb criminals book: A flasher came in to a laundromat and exposed himself.
A lady points and laughs and says: Look!
It looks just like a penis only smaller.
And kept on laughing.
