Here are some things that scare me about men:
(Disclaimer: gender roles are stupid.
You have my joyful blessing to be an outlier to the generalizations below.)
1.Men and women seem so different.
God & Man
Im not offended because a fantasy is a fantasy, but its not something I am personally into whatsoever.
It doesnt make any part of my body do a little pitter-patter of excitement.
Someone who sees you and wants you and fucks you the way you specifically want to be fucked.
4.I think (???)
both fantasies could make both sexes happy.
A chance encounter isnt a terrible way to start a romantic fling.
But that promise so often dies out before it even starts.
Men lose interest (???)
when theyve slept with you.
Its not the beginning of anything for them, its the end.
It doesnt always happen this way, but enough.
5.When women have good sex they want more good sex.
These are two very different moods.
It reads as work to a lot of them.
Labor to put in so that get something out of.
Even though they seem so happy while its happening.
7.Also like, the whole narrative that men want freedom but will give it up for a relationship.
This is just exhausting to think about.
8.This seems really bad.
Maybe it is just me.
I dont really think its just me, but its hard not to consider.
9.Which is another thing.
I dont have an infinite reservoir inside me of love and affection and self-confidence.
I have to spend months getting over this.
It sucks that it takes months and I agree with anyone who says its overkill.
But thats just how long it takes.
I dont participate in all men are trash culture because I think its fundamentally both untrue and harmful.
But my expectations arent high.
11.I just want to be full-time adored.
12.And I have no control over this.
13.And no one gets to have that anyway.
14.Another scary thing is that I am reasonably independent and accustomed to time alone.
I think I could be very happy living in the woods, hoarding animals, and writing poetry.
Like driving with no headlights.
16.Its scary to be worn down.
What is going to happen if I fail for another 10 years?
18.Is anyone else out there?
20.A one foot in front of the other kinda thing?
21.Its hard that theres no answer.
Its out of my control.
I dont want to use my brain space for this.
I think love is an interesting topic but Im bored of it.
I want to learn about trees and space and read as many memoirs as I can.
But thats not a cure.
Because the monkey will not let go of the banana, the monkey is trapped.
