Maybe I took a melatonin the night before and havent snapped out of it yet.
And Im going to be even later because I cant find some crucial possession at the very last minute.
And sometimes life too.
Some other kind of work, even if its just making the effort to entertain myself.
And then I go to sleep and wake up and do it all over again.
I am seventeen and staring at the front door of the restaurant waiting for someone to come in.
That I didnt spend so much time feeling so alone.
I miss the bubbly, outgoing girl I used to be before I started questioning all my friendships.
Because Im the only one who knows thats not really who I am.
Im just waiting for something, for anything, to happen.
So I usually just skip it anyway.
Im looking forward to another of my friends shows this weekend, except Im jealous of that too.
How shes made friends with all her cast mates.
How funny and cool they seemed.
How captivating they were onstage.
Im staring out the window of the train like I do every morning.
That its okay to feel unsatisfied with the ordinary when youve experienced something extraordinary.
Its okay to prefer fainting to being bored to death.
And Im going to be even later because I cant find some crucial possession at the very last minute.
Some other kind of work, even if its just making the effort to entertain myself.
