I wanted you to love me but you only made me love myself less.
By
Updated 6 years ago,November 11, 2018
You never returned the attention given to you.
Sometimes you didnt even bother to reply at all.
Jenny Woods
I spent more time on you than you realize.
I dressed up with the plan of posting pictures of myself, hoping you would see.
Hoping it would nudge you to initiate the conversation for a change.
I fought for you to acknowledge my existence and it only worked half the time.
I would constantly be nervous about sending the wrong message and making you shut down.
The nights we spent bantering until midnight were the worst because they renewed my hopes of becoming yours.
We obviously had a connection.
There were sparks flying between us.
We could talk for hours.
But only when you wanted to talk.
I liked youso muchthat I assumed you must have shared my feelings.
I kept chasing you, though.
I thought texting you and complimenting you and appealing to your ego would change your mind about me.
No matter how many times you ignored me, I didnt want to give up on you.
A part of me still wants to cling on after all this time.
But I know you are bad for my mental health.
Chasing you deepened my insecurities.
It drained my energy.
It ignited my abandonment issues.
You made me question whether anyone would ever want me.
You made me hate myself a little more each day.
Chasing after you, and getting nothing in return, messed with my mind.
It made me cringe at the mirror.
It made the little voice in the back of my head use words likeuglyandboringanduseless.
I wanted you to love me but you only made me lovemyselfless.
It sucks that our love story was one-sided all along.
