I lost my loneliness.
Feeling like I’m in this alone.
Feeling like I can’t count on you.
God & Man
Feeling your absence more than your presence.
The night of me staring at my phone waiting for a response to a simple message.
The nights of me feeling sorry for myself.
I lost my insecurities.The days I wondered why Im not good enough for you.
The times I wondered why youpicked her.
The nights I forgot my own worth and the qualities that make me unique.
God & Man
The times I put you on a pedestal and blamed myself for yourinabilityto love me.
I lost my fears.The fear I had that I couldpush you awayif I said the wrong thing.
The fear that you will get to know me and find me boring or unattractive.
The fear that you might break my heart one day.
I lost my fears because there was nothing I couldve done to make you stay.
You never wanted to stay anyway.
You never wanted my love.
I lost one-sided attention and one-sided excitement and one-sided expectations.
I lost my loneliness.Feeling like Im in this alone.
Feeling like I cant count on you.
Feeling your absence more than your presence.
Coming up with lies and excuses to defend you.
Going home to an empty bed waiting for you to come around.
I lost playing games.Trying to be someone else for you.
Trying to impress you so you could see what I see.
Trying to act like Im cool with things that I absolutely resent.
Changing myself for you.
Forgetting my needs to meet yours.
I lost you and I lost settling for less than what I deserve.
Losing you made me realize that loving you meantunlovingmyself.
Loving you meant being passive, cold-hearted and weak.
Loving you meant giving in to half-hearted love, confusion, doubt, tears and heartbreak.
