It’s always a shock when people comment on how little I’ve changed.
I wonder what theyre thinking with each update, wonder what story each picture tells.
Its easy to make your life appear a certain way online, with the screen as your separator.
Jayson Hinrichsen
Some people will be able to see past the performance, but others will believe it.
Theyll assume they havent missed a thing.
Theyll assume theyre caught up on your life when they dont know the half of it.
Theyll think what they want to think.
I wonder if Ive been changed in the night.
Was I the same when I got up this morning?
I almost think I can remember feeling a little different.
But if Im not the same, the next question is Who in the world am I?'
I feel so detached from my old self that I can look at her as another person.
A person to pity.
A person who didnt realize how beautiful life could get or how cruel it could be.
Its always a shock when people comment on how little Ive changed.
Im not her anymore and its almost insulting when people think were one and the same.
Itshouldntbe insulting, of course.
I should love every piece of me, even the parts that no longer exist.
But thats not the case.
Learning to love myself in the present is strenuous enough.
But Im slowly realizing that society has shaped me in a million different ways.
Its swayed me into believing certain truths without me consciously realizing what was happening.
The problem is… realizing Ive been wrong about certain aspects of myself hasnt given me a magicalahamoment.
Its only made me more lost.
My own brain is an unreliable narrator.
They could be a monster in disguise.
They could be the killer in the last chapter.
But what happens when the person you dont know is yourself?
