By
Updated 2 years ago,June 5, 2023
Show me what it looks like.
No, I dont want you to.
You dont have to be afraid, he said.
Oh, but I was every single day.
Those words came from my boyfriend.
He promised me I didnt need to be afraid of what my skin looked like.
My entire feet, ankle, and legs looked burned.
I was covered in rashes and not the pleasant kind.
Even I was disturbed by it.
This is so unfair that I have to go through this, I thought to myself.
I felt like an embarrassment, not just to myself, but pretty much…everyone.
I was letting my boyfriend down.
I was letting my workplace down.
I couldnt even meet clients without my entire face and neck covered in rashes.
I felt like an embarrassment to every new person I met.
I couldnt recognize myself in the mirror anymore.
Makeup wouldnt even cover the rashes.
There was too much texture.
My face and body were covered in scabs.
I was living in so much pain and agony because of the rashes.
It caused me not just physical pain, but emotional pain (the depressive, suicidal kind).
I felt like such a big failure.
We had only started dating 2-3 months ago.
Our relationship was so new.
And it was fresh.
I felt like I had already ruined it with the way my skin looked.
Dont be afraid, he assured me again.
I remember crying in the middle of the night.
I had seen people end relationships and get divorced because of eczema and topical steroid withdrawal (TSW).
It affected my boyfriends life and my familys life.
Even my brother had cried over my condition before.
What is wrong with me?
We did everything in my power to heal.
I sought nutritionists, naturopaths, and doctors who could help me with my condition.
And one day it slowly started getting better.
I remember visiting my naturopath for an appointment one day.
Tears welled up in my eyes.
I will never forget those words.
If you saw what I looked like, youd be scared too.
Eczema stole so much from me.
It took away my life.
It really robbed me of so much joy.
But in the midst of it, I found so much love.
I discovered what loyalty meant.
I found a love that never left me.
I learned that I was worth loving, despite what I looked like.
Not all relationships have sad endings because of this.
So I decided to make a wise decision: to marry him.
This year will be our 8 year anniversary.
Within those 8 years, I also birthed 2 kids.
One of them was born on Valentines Day this year, a day of love.
Even on the worst day, life can still be beautiful.
