By
Updated 8 months ago,September 4, 2024
Weve all been there.
Youre seeing a guy… a guy you really like.
You take a stab at undo your mistake and fix the situation.
And usually, you make yourself look even more desperate.
First, lets just talk about what neediness is.
We picture a clingy, crazy woman making a fool of herself in pursuit of the man she loves.
But neediness is not a set of behaviors, its a mindset.
After these feelings build up over time, she snaps.
It wont get you anywhere, it wont erase anything in his mind.Men hear actions louder than words.
Dont keep having conversations about it.
And then just stop acting needy.
Just turn it around.
Now thats easier said than done.it’s crucial that you get to the heart of the neediness.
Ask yourself:
Maybe the thought of losing him terrifies you… so unpack that a little more.
Why is that so scary?
What will that mean to you?
And if he does leave… what will happen?
Next, make a plan for how you will go about having a more fulfilling life.
The obsession grows in vacant space.
If you have an emotional void, you will outsource the task of filling it to others.
But no one can give you things like self-worth or even happiness.
These things come from within.
Neediness is because of not feeling OK, but feeling like something essential is missing.
So attempt to give yourself those missing ingredients.
A good place to start is asking yourself: what does my ideal day look like?
What time do you wake up?
Who do you hang out with?
What do you do?
Where do you go?
attempt to visualize your perfect day from start to finish.
Tap into the things that bring you joy.
The mistake so many of us make is looking to him- how is he feeling?
What is he thinking?
Does he still want me?
But really, we need to look within- why do I feel this pull toward him?
Why do I not feel OK unless I hear from him?
What needs is he fulfilling for me?
Look inward at yourself and start doing the work.
Focus on filling yourself up rather than on figuring out how hes feeling.
If you have this mindset shift, everything will work out.
