I don’t need it to be the primary arc, I just need the possibility you know.
The possibility exists for us both.
By
Updated 6 years ago,November 2, 2018
I have a question for you,she says.
Dustin Adams
I look up from a daze and blink a few times at her.
I scan her face and the sentiments behind her brown eyes.
I can see a hint of doubt and uncertainty.
I wonder what she sees in mine.Stop analyzing me, she interjects.
I smile and shrug my shoulders and wait for her to ask the mystery question.
I have a question for you,she says.
Do you think well get happily ever after too?
This time I grab the Moscato from her and take a few sips.
Shes not going to like my answer, not at first anyway.
No,I tell her.
I am careful with my words because I dont want to further the doubt in her eyes.
Im cemented in my pessimism, a lost cause of sort but she isnt.
Theres still hope for someone like her.
No, we wont have what they have, not exactly.
There are different types of happily ever after.
What they have is the classic jot down you are referring to.
Its the one you see in stories, the cliche shit you know.
She nods her head and takes another sip of the wine, attentively listening to my remarks.
I scan her face once more.
I can see how she is searching for a glimpse of hope in my words.
But I am not in the business of giving out false hope either.
Ive been subjected to the perils of false hope enough to know its ramifications firsthand.
I can take the hits but she and the others are too delicate for such truths.
I choose my words carefully, weary of misleading her but also wanting to be honest.
That jot down of happily ever after needs to exist for girls like them.
Its the central narrative of their lives.
Sure, there are other storylines in their lives.
I am not saying that they dont have other aspirations.
Its just that those aspirations come secondary to love for them.
Theres no judgement in their choices, its just the way they are wired.
Its my turn to now with the wine.
I take a few extra sips and watch her take in my words.
I can see the wheels in her head turning as she comes to term with my words.
Well get happily ever after too but not like theirs.
Ours is defined more by our solo pursuits than anything else.
The central narrative in our lives wont be love, it will be something greater.
Our calling is just different but it will still be a happy one.
I dont want to ruin her with my jaded ways but I dont want to lie.
I decide on a middle ground.
You may still get it, of course the possibility exists.
It just may not be the primary arc of your story.
I think what I have just said worked.
The possibility exists for us both.I dont answer her.
I just stare at the nearly empty wine bottle between us.
I already know my fate.
I came to terms with it years ago.
I dont relate to the hope I just rectified in her eyes but it suits her.
Eyes like hers shouldnt be tainted with doubt or uncertainty.
Eyes like hers gleam in the presence of faith, just like they do at this very moment.
