By
Updated 8 years ago,June 6, 2017
For some reason, its always 2 am.
You might think it would be the witching hour.
Same old song and dance.
Alessio Lin
The carriage is turning back into a pumpkin.
A drunk girl on Santa Monica Blvd.
is yelling to her friends, GUYS, THE UBER IS HERE!
And yet, midnight doesnt feel cheap.
It doesnt feel lonely.
Seems full of possibility, in some weird way.
Alessio Lin
The start of another 24 hours for your life to magically change.
But later, at 2 am, things go south.
Because at 2 am, someone is crying in bed alone.
Or not alone but still alone.
Because at 2 am, like clockwork, Im mad at myself for things I did three years ago.
Im dissecting conversations I should have buried already.
Im looking at photos or reaching for my phone.
Im making a list of all the people I lost touch with.
Im wanting to hug them all.
I search every ex Ive ever had.
Some that probably dont even realize I think of them as an ex.
I see some of them happy and in love and hate myself for being angry.
Angry that everyone else seems to move on so easily.
I stay stuck running a romantic hamster wheel.
Ive never known how to make a graceful exit.
2 am, Im absentmindedly browsing Netflix out of pure habit.
Im not drifting off peacefully.
And I dont want my 2 am thoughts.
So theresBuffy The Vampire Slayer.
OrThe Office,the oddly comfortingFriendslaugh track keeping me company.
Nothing good happens at 2 am.
Im awake, but I dont want to be.
Im buzzing, but I should stay still.
Im cursing out insomnia, and she yells right back.
