If an individual ischronically sarcastic and usessarcasm to belittle and bully others.
Psychopathscan engage in sarcasm for harmful reasons.According toDr.
Robert Harespsychopathy checklist,psychopathsare prone toboredomand need constant stimulation.
Toobtainthat stimulation, theymayengage in reckless behaviors andmanufacturechaos on purpose.Neuroscience studiesindicate theymayeven findwitnessing or causingthe pain of others rewarding.
Their sarcastic jabs at others can be tailored to create that chaos and gain that sense of reward.
Sarcasm was always there, but itdefinitely escalatedduring later phases of the relationship.
Sarcasm was often used as a subtle way to minimize my feelings or put me down.
It turns out, Iactually lovejoking around.
I justdontlike manipulation wearing the cowardly disguise of sarcasm or jokes.
There isa big difference.
Jokesshouldntmake you feel bad.
Erin
Sarcasm can be used with plausible deniability to make you doubtyourself.
Sarcasm and humor are weaponized by them in a multifaceted way.
Plausible deniability is one way.
Sarcasm works well with plausible deniability.
I complain about nature of this gift.
He then counters with, Jeez, where is your sense of humor?
Sarcasm will also be freely used when delivering praise, so the praise is rendered meaningless.
They can just snapshot youandfit you into a stereotype.
Ifyoucantprove otherwise and get frustrated after a while,that just serves to prove their point.
So,they startonthe sarcasmas early as possible eveninthe first day to protect themselves from reality.
You are not given a chance to explain your whole, nuanced opinion.
It took some time before he was bold or drunk enough to verbalize these thoughts to me.
He was just exercising his wit.
The word sarcasm comes from a Greek word which means tearing of the flesh.
It is abuse I learned.
I understand that, even today its used as a communication style on some dating sites.
They would just look at him, confused.
It caused them to be upset and anxious.
Others were horrified but I just laughed it off for years…but thats what we do isnt it?
We spend years trying to help fix them.
At first not at all and then all day to make fun of me or provoke me to react.
Little digs making a toxic environment and keeping me on edge.
Highlighting my insecurities and ramping them up.
Interspersed with a compliment here and there to keep me from leaving.RC
They would say, So I guessyoureperfect.
This was blameshifting sarcasm when there is irrefutable evidence that they are in the wrong.
He was trying to gaslight me into believing that my experience of the situation was wrong.
I absolutely believe that it was a belittling tactic and it made me feel completely dismissed and disrespected.
When obviously I know that I do and did.
I know my own feelings and emotions.
No, because jokes should make people laugh, not hurt.
Or things like Sure, youll do that, just like you did x.
You cant take a joke.
They blame you in the end.
Ill add that this doesnt relate to only partners as Ive seen friends do this too.
Sarcasm used to knock me down a peg under the guise of teasing.
Also used in extended bits to poke at vulnerable areas like family or work dynamics.
I remember privately telling the narcissist about how I was bullied in grade school because of my teeth.
The narcissist brought this up at a lunch date with friends and everyone started laughing.
I gave her a look and she started saying, Well you were the one who brought it up.
I thought that meant you could laugh about it now.
Come on, chill I was just teasing.
I guess this was a form ofdog-whistlingtoo.
I would just get quiet after this, and the sarcasm would continue like Why are you quiet?
Knowing damn well why I was quiet and just wanted to be left alone.
She is my heroit woke me up.Lisa
Psychopathscan use sarcasm to threatenothers.
I wasimpactedby apsychopaththat used psychosexual abuse, exploitation, psychological warfare, andlikely warof attrition.
Mypsychopathliterally gotoff on terrorizing me and his eyes would turnblack.
Mypsychopathwould terrorize me along with his family that I was experiencing Stockholm syndrome.
Then tell me I am smart when I say I dont like it.
Go talk to your invisible sky daddy.
This was when he touted himself as an atheist on social media.
In his mouth it was sarcasm.
At the time I had no idea why.
Now I know he was jealous of the person I am.
Just hearing Oh yeah, well…
He used sarcasm to demean my interests, my tattoos, my dogs, my friends on social media.
It made me feel stupid for a number of reasons and they felt superior.
Remember that healthy partners are not condescending or belittling.
You deserve to be respected in your relationships.
You may want to process yourtraumaswith amental health professionaland seek support.
You deserve healing and freedom.
