Narcissists move quickly to create unrealistic expectations.
Once they feel like they have someone under their spell, they will change their behavior completely.
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Updated 5 years ago,September 23, 2020
A good relationship requires more than true love.
Chichi Onyekanne
It also requires effort, patience, respect, and communication.
Although each relationship is different in their own way, they tend to follow the same path.
During the honeymoon period, a person will only see the good in their partner.
Their infatuation will blind them to any and all of their partners flaws.
They will spend a lot of quality time together as their relationship grows more and more intimate.
There wont be any conflict yet because they believe they are in the perfect relationship.
People who tend to jump from relationship to relationship without ever getting serious are infatuated by the honeymoon phase.
They are trying to make the butterflies last.
The couple will start to doubt one another as the reality of their situation sets in.
They will get frustrated with each other.
They will bicker with each other.
The issues between them are obvious.
They can no longer keep quiet about their complaints, so their arguments are on the rise.
They are fighting more than they ever have in the past.
Its impossible to date without conflict.
How theydealwith the conflict and resolve their issues is what matters.
There wont be any big problems or arguments.
However, they will also start to grow restless and bored.
At this point, the couple will feel completely comfortable with each other.
They will have fun with each other.
They will consider each other best friends.
This final stage is the point where couples consider marriage and children.
They start to plan out their futures together.
They are excited to see what tomorrow holds.
They no longer yearn for the honeymoon period from their past because theyve found something even better.
Couples who reach this stage have discovered timeless, lasting love.
Timeline
Each relationship stage lasts for a different amount of time.
Although the timeframe will differ from couple to couple, most relationships will follow the same pattern.
The third stage of a relationship will last about a year.
This is how long it will take to work through their issues and reach a place of stability.
The fifth stage of the relationship has the potential to last forever.
Once the couple is in a committed relationship, they are not going to want to separate.
This one tracks relationship development as well as relationship decline.
After all, love is tricky.
An interpersonal relationship is hard to make but easy to break.
Initiation stage.This stage can last as little as ten or fifteen seconds.
It happens when two people meet each other and are intrigued by their appearance or personality.
Experimenting stage.This stage is when two strangers get to know each other.
They ask basic conversational questions so you can figure out whether they want to take a chance on dating.
Most people dont progress past this stage.
Intensifying stage.During this stage, the relationship becomes less formal.
The two people develop a closeness that makes them feel comfortable and seen.
Integrating stage.This is the stage when two people officially become a couple.
They will consider the other person a romantic partner, not a friend.
Bonding stage.This stage involves marriage or a more informal commitment like becoming boyfriend and girlfriend.
Differentiating.During this stage, the couple starts feeling doubtful and grows apart.
They act as individuals instead of a team.
Circumscribing.Communication stops at this stage.
The couple keeps secrets and avoids certain conversations to keep the peace.
Avoiding.The couple spends less and less time together.
They grow apart emotionally and physically.
Terminating.This happens when the couple decides to part ways.
This could happen amicably or it could involve a major argument.
Stages with a Narcissist
Dating a narcissist is entirely different than being in a healthy relationship.
Be careful, because here are the four stages with a narcissist:
1.
Idealization
In the beginning of the relationship, a narcissist will make their partner feel special.
They will shower their person with love, attention, and romance.
They will trick their partner into believing they are the perfect person.
They will advance the arrangement from a casual relationship to an intimate relationship in a short period of time.
Narcissists move quickly for create unrealistic expectations.
Once they feel like they have someone under their spell, they will change their behavior completely.
Devaluation
This stage is when the narcissist will reveal their true self and the manipulation will begin.
They will also start to lie, keep secrets, and gaslight.
Worst of all, they will become verbally abusive to get to make their partner feel bad about themselves.
They will want their partner to feel lucky that they are in a relationship at all.
Love-bombing is when someone uses sweet words, actions, and behaviors as a manipulation technique.
Discard
Narcissists are never as romantic as they seem at the beginning of the relationship.
All they want is power, money, sex, and attention.
They will move onto someone new who they can easily manipulate and the cycle will start all over again.
At this point, their original partner will be given the chance to escape.
However, the narcissist might not be out of their lives forever.
It might not be long until they make a return.
Hoover
Narcissists arent happy unless they are in control.
They could use the same love-bombing tactics they used at the beginning of the relationship to get their way.
They could also get emotional, cry, and beg for their partner back.
However, this is not out of love.
This is out of the desire to control their partner once again.
After all, a narcissist is not going to change.
They are only going to make someonethinktheyve changed so they can begin the cycle again.
