These are criticism, contempt, defensiveness and stonewalling.
Have you ever been silenced by a toxic persons silent treatment?
You may have experienced what is known asstonewalling.
God & Man
These are criticism, contempt, defensiveness and stonewalling.
Stonewalling is when a person withdraws from a conversation or discussion and refuses to address your concerns.
Withdrawing from a partner like this can be extremely damaging to a relationship over time.
He has been neglecting her and criticizing her constantly.
She attempts to bring it up to him during dinner, only to be met with his stony silence.
Hegaslightsher and tells her shes overreacting.
When she tries to explain herself, he abruptly says, I am done!
The conversation hasnt even had a chance to begin before its already over.
He returns her call the next day and acts as if nothing has happened.
This causes more distress to Mary and unnecessary tension and trauma.
Stonewalling and The Silent Treatment
Usually, stonewalling and the silent treatment go hand in hand.
Yet the silent treatment can also occur without warning or stonewalling as well.
This silent treatment causes their partner excessive anxiety, fear and a persistent sense of self-doubt.
In relationships, stonewalling is the emotional equivalent to cutting off someones oxygen.
And when these efforts fail, the internal response for your spouse is predictable.He doesnt care.
He doesnt love me.
Pipe, Psy.D,Stonewalling vs.
Your thoughts and feelings dont matter to me.Youdont matter to me.
Being ignored can leave someone feeling injured literally.
These effects can linger powerfully for the victim, causing fresh abandonment wounds and reinforcing old ones.
Occasionally in a relationship, someone might want a break from communicating to cool off.
When that happens, both partners communicate that this is what they need.
They do so in a manner that is both respectful and considerate.
Stonewalling by a narcissistic partner, however, is different.
It is callous, cold and charged with manipulative intent.
A toxic persons communication patterns cannot be changed unless that person is willing to change them.
You have to learn when it is time to walk away and detach from this person.
Otherwise, youre just feeding into their sick mind games.
When a narcissist stonewalls you or subjects you to the silent treatment, theywantyou to respond.
They want you to chase after them and beg for their attention.
They want to provoke you.
They want to control and diminish you.
A person who truly cares for you would make an effort to meet your needs, not neglect them.
You deserve to be seen, not silenced.
You deserve to be in a healthy relationship where your needs are acknowledged and your voice is heard.
