On a larger scale, they ruin entire lives.
Perhaps, on a smaller but still significant scale, they ruin something their victims are looking forward to.
The narcissistic father stumbles drunk into another one of his kids birthday parties.
Alex Stoddard
The abusive mother prevents her daughter from going to prom after weeks of preparing her beautiful dress.
Or, even more deviously, they may set up an elaborate scenario that prepares their victims for failure.
They might prepare a birthday celebration for their victims, only to stir up arguments the entire time.
They could offer to treat you to a date, just to abandon you on the day of.
Usually during an abuse cycle, there are multiple incidents of these covert sabotage attempts.
How does it happen?
Alex Stoddard
Why does it happen?
And what does it mean for the victims of crimes where the murderers often get away with clean hands?
Every step the victim takes, he or she is blocked from getting to the destination.
This is also known asduping delight.
To grant narcissists a grandiose sense of power.
To the malignant narcissist, it feels good to play God.
In fact, a sense of grandiosity is part of theirdiagnostic criteria.
To devalue, diminish and provoke their victims into looking like the crazy ones.
How do you make a victim look like the crazy one after you abuse them?
Well, you check that toprovoke theminto reacting, especially in public.
Even the strongest of individuals eventually snap when subjected to long periods of terrorizing behavior.
To derive a sense of sadistic pleasure.
Researchhas indicated that those on the more malignant end of narcissism tend to derive joy from seeing sad faces.
They enjoy inflicting pain to be the cause of it is even more thrilling for them.
You werechosenbecause you had beautiful and brilliant qualities that were used against you.
They love seeing that light enshrouded in their darkness.
Remember that many of these individuals are pathologically envious and despise seeing you shine.
Instead, you must use your experiences to build your inner wisdom, knowledge, resources and self-validation.
Stand in the truth of who you really are and what happened to you.
Use everything they did to you as motivation and fuel to flourish.
You must build organic support systems and networks outside of them networks they cannot touch.
You must use these experiences not to stoop to their level, but to catapult yourself intogreater heights.
You must use what youve learned for your highest good and the greater good.
Your experiences, your stories can collectively lead to change, to revolution, to increased awareness.
Its in shining a light on their darkness, while continuing to shine brightly.
