), can be explained by understanding a few core concepts.
I remember there was this one week when four of my friends called me for relationship advice.
Choose wisely
Your relationship success is basically determined before you even enter into the relationship.
Clarisse Meyer
It starts with who you choose.
And time and time again I was left utterly baffled as to why things never worked out for me.
Why did they never want me like I wanted them?
Why did it never get past a certain point?
Why did I always feel so powerless in my relationships?
But seriously, choice is everything.
You cant choose a loser and expect him to transform into a winner.
Focus on what matters, and these things arent what set the foundation for a lasting, loving relationship!
If you want a serious relationship, choose a guy who wants the same thing.
If you have certain values, choose a guy who shares those values.
If you want to start a family in the near future, choose a guy who also wants that.
Love isnt enough to conquer incompatibility and emotional baggage.
When a guy likes you, its obvious!
I relate to the whole does he like me?
dilemma that so many women face on a deeply personal level.
I was always struggling to figure out how a guy felt during my single days.
Heres the ugly truth: Its not confusing.
If you have to ask, you have your answer.
When a guy likes you, itsobvious.
You dont question it because it would be a ridiculous question to ask.
Its just so clear and plain to see.
You know it and everyone around you knows it.
This was probably one of the most mind-blowing revelations for me.
And its the one phrase I repeat to my single friends and readers all the time.
When you have to ask … you already know the answer!
Seriously, why do we do this to ourselves?
Were so worried about the relationship that we cant beinthe relationship.
I totally get it, though.
The fears are real.
What if he doesnt like me as much as I like him?
What if he isnt serious about me?
What if hes a liar like my ex?
What if he cheats on me?
What if he finds someone better?
You think hitting certain milestones will keep the crazies away, but that doesnt work either.
Maybe you think as soon as he calls you his girlfriend youll be able to relax.
Then he makes it official but you worry about him having second thoughts or changing his mind.
Stop all of it!
It gets you nowhere.
All youre doing is feeding your own insecurities and giving them more strength and power over you.
Also, it doesnt feel good to be around a stressed out person.
When youre on a date, dont worry about whether hes going to ask you on another date.
Dont worry about how he feels and what hes thinking.
make a run at relax and justbe.
You cant win them all.
This is probably the toughest lesson to learn, but so important for your sanity and self-esteem.
So lets say youre seeing a guy and you fall hard and fast.
He is everything youve ever wanted, he literally checks every box.
You cant help but get excited about the possibilities … but then he ends things.
And you are crushed beyond belief.
You mentally go back in time analyzing everything about the relationship to figure out what you did wrong.
Why werent you enough?
You just werent the right girl for him and thats OK because not everyone is a match.
You make a mess for yourself when you take it personally because it really isnt personal.
All you’re able to do is work on being your best self.
This is all you have control over.
Your vibe matters more than your looks.
Yes, looks matter.
No, they dont matter as much as you think.
And the good news is your vibe is totally under your control!
Its about managing your mood and not letting yourself be overcome by anxious thoughts and negativity.
It may feel like you have no control, but thats not the case.
When it feels good to be around you, he wants to be around you,a lot.
Thats really all it takes to get a man to commit and to invest in you and the relationship.
