Some start by a shared bond of complaining.
I felt like I was her friend.
Like she had trusted me.
Jessica Da Rosa
That is, until it was starting to become too much for me to listen to.
I mean, who wanted to hear about someone elses problems all day?
And I could not imagine being that emotionally overbearing to someone else.
Until I realized I was being that overbearing to other people.
There is a very fine line between venting and what psychology calls trauma dumping.
I was consistently bringing up the past when I could have let it go.
I know that isnt simple.
It takes therapy or meditation or maybe a yoga retreat to let our most painful experiences go.
But I had to ask myself honestly, Do I like being the victim of my own lifes narrative?
and Did I kind of enjoy talking about it?
It probably isnt that cut and dry.
I think mainly I was still trying to make sense of these things.
But in a lot of other ways, I did like talking about them.
But I had to factor in my responsibility for my own pain.
A moment of silence for this sobering statement.
When I read this, my stomach sank.
I really felt terrible.
The very thought of traumatizing someone else challenged a part of me that liked to believe I was good.
But before you roll shaming yourself, stop.
Like, I dont know, the way you may have hurt others, too?
None of us are perfect.
And you are also still a good person.
it’s possible for you to do something to change it.
Doing it with kindness, love, and intention.
