He ghosted me, but it wasnt that black and white.
It was a Wednesday night in Boston, cold enough to want to stay home and indoors.
But instead I put myself together, styled an outfit, and made my way outdoors.
Kuroko Ukou
Our conversation wasnt just easy, it was stimulating, and I grew intrigued each passing moment.
It was hard not to smile throughout as our conversation isolated us from everyone else in the restaurant.
We took the hint and concluded our first date with my mind stuck on seeing him again.
When wed text, Id jump with excitement each time my phone sounded and his name appeared.
The problem: it quickly became clear that he was a busy guy and hard to make plans with.
But we did see each other again, and it was great until we didnt see each other again.
I never thought the last time would be the last, but now its clear that he did know.
Eventually,he ghosted me, but it wasnt that black and white.
I was crushed, and I was frustrated.
It hurt me, and as in most ghosting cases, there was a wide range of unknowns.
I accepted that this thing that seemed so great unfortunately wasnt going anywhere.
Even if I had managed to get the answers, it wouldnt change the outcome.
And you learned at the beginning rather than being strung along.
You learnedthat he wasnt the right person for you;you learnedthat he wasnt ready to love you.
Our meeting wasnt for nothing, I learned something about him, and I learned something about myself.
I grew with knowledge and experience, and although rejection hurts, I know the pain stops.
If youre rationalizing someone elses behavior only to block out your pain, youre only prolongingyour healingprocess.
The pain is temporary, but you have to feel it first before it can pass.
You will heal, and you will find someone to fall mutually invested in.
Theres hope for everyone that wants it.
