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Updated 7 months ago,September 19, 2024
Why are breakups so hard?
I receive countless questions wanting to know where it all went wrong and how to get him back.
They rip you apart from the inside out and the pain can almost be unbearable.
Unsplash / Charlie Foster
But have you ever stopped to think about why that is?
Why do they wreck us so spectacularly?
A lot of women believe the pain is brought on by not having this amazing guy anymore.
They believe his absence is causing the pain and thus, getting him back will take the pain away.
However, this isnt necessarily the case and the real reason can often go a little deeper.
As humans, we all have the same core fundamental desires.
The desire to be loved is a universal one.
In most relationships, the high experienced is really that of our desire being fulfilled.
When he leaves, the devastation is immense.
When a relationship dies its so easy to get caught up in longing.
You long for the other person, believing he was the perfect man for you.
The important thing to remember here is it isnthimyoure missing.
What youre longing for is that love and sense of fulfillment.
This topic strikes a particularly strong chord with me due to personal experience.
I once fell very hard for a man that was very wrong for me.
On paper, this guy was a mess.
So what the heck was I doing in this relationship?
Well, when I was with him I felt special.
Hmm … separate topic!)
I was unhappy in the relationship, but it didnt matter.
When the relationship ended, I was a disaster.
I would get high off of being wanted by guys.
In time, I realized that he wasnt the missing ingredient in my life; self-love was.
People who know their worth and genuinely love themselves can move on from experiences with their heads held high.
They dont see a breakup as a personal failure or as a sign that they arent enough.
They can look back and say, I had trouble opening up in this relationship.
