You suck because youre letting a few terrible times alter your perception of the way the world dates.

you could waste your time on dating apps when youre really not looking for something casual.

But that doesnt mean theres something wrong with modern dating.

modern dating, love and relationships,

Toa Heftiba

That means you just suck.

You suck because youre letting a few terrible times alter your perception of the way the world dates.

Sure, sometimes modern dating sucks.

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But thats not the reality of how it is.

Which is honestly beautiful, if you give it a legitimate chance.

The truth is, for every negative experience youve had, there are a million other positives.

modern dating, love and relationships,

Toa Heftiba

The truth is, therearegenuine people out there.

People who love to love, who want to be open, who are sensitive and caring and kind.

Youre never going to have a positive attitude going into a new relationship.

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Youre never going to believe in the truth someone shares with you.

Youre never going to really let yourself open, or let someone in.

And youre going to be miserable.

You give people eye contact.

You put down your phone.

You tell someone something on your heart or mind.

How about you take some ownership of the way the dating world has changed?

How about we all take some ownership?

How about we all stop sucking at this and start loving without fear?

But have you taken a look at yourself?

Have you been forgiving, receptive, open?

Or have you let a few bad experiences cloud the way you look at anyone you meet?

Maybe its not really modern dating that sucks; maybe its you.

Marisa Donnelly is a poet and author of the book,Somewhere on a Highway, availablehere.