I can’t bring myself to delete them.
It would be like admitting defeat.
It would be like officially letting you go – and I’m not ready to do that yet.
Unsplash / Becca Tapert
It would be like admitting defeat.
It would be like officially letting you go and Im not ready to do that yet.
I dont want you out of my life.
I dont want to erase every trace of your existence.
I refuse to forget the way you made me feel.
I keep rereading our old texts, because Im hoping that Ill find clues about why you left.
Unsplash / Becca Tapert
For a reason why you hurt me.
You couldnt have stopped caring out of the blue.
There must have been red flags that I never noticed before.
I keep rereading our old texts, because I miss you more than I can take.
Its a way for me to feel close to you, even though youre far away.
I keep rereading old texts, because they are a reminder that Im not crazy.
That there reallywassomething between us once upon a time.
It wasnt all in my head.
I wasnt reading too far into things.
The texts you sent prove that you had feelings for me, too.
They prove that it wasnt always asone-sidedas it feels now.
I keep rereading our old texts, because its easier to play pretend than to face reality.
The way my eyes used to light up when your name popped onto the screen.
The way that I would scramble to think of a flirtatious reply.
The way you would always flirt back.
I keep rereading our old texts, because I torture myself whenever I get the chance.
I listen tosad songsthat remind me of you.
I watch your favorite shows.
I replay our memories over and over again in my head until I cant take the pain anymore.
Instead of forgetting about you, I drown myself in thoughts of you.
I cant help myself.
I miss you too much.
