If you want to overcome self-sabotage, you have to take the scenic route.
You have to go around the back.
When Carl Jung was a kid, he fell on the ground in school and hit his head.
Derrick Freske
He didnt like school, and didnt fit in well.
From then, he started having sporadic and uncontrollable fainting spells.
He unconsciously developed what he would come to call a neurosis.
As Jung himself said: a neurosis is always a substitute for legitimate suffering.
Firm in your idea of safe.
Stuck, ultimately, in a small, familiar world.
Derrick Freske
Behavioral therapy also teaches that what is affirmed and reaffirmed is what persists.
Unfortunately, people who are sickest and poorest and most helpless get the most love.
Consider this: maybe its connection that you want.
Your attempts to get people to notice you have fallen flat.
But when you speak about your ongoing problems, you get sympathy.
It masks as understanding.
In that moment, your need for love is satiated.
But it doesnt last not forever.
That is because real connection cant be faked.
Real love cannot be replaced.
A neurosis is not a way to really make yourself feel safe, it is a pacifier.
This is not easy.
This will not happen overnight.
You dont just decide to love yourself one day and then see the fruits of that decision bloom.
Like any good relationship, self-love is generated.
Overcoming self-sabotage doesnt mean youre going to be the most successful person in the room.
At the end of the day, it is only yourself that you have to answer to.
Other peoples opinions fade and shift.
