Moments where I realize sometimes the people you are closest to are the ones you grow farthest apart from.
It just happens in little moments.
When I hear a song on the radio.
Jenny Woods
When Im walking through the bookstore and I see your favorite book.
When I read something good myself and I realize I dont have anyone to share that with anymore.
It happens on certain streets and in certain places.
And I still do.
Even though so much time has passed I still look at that list of everything youve missed lately.
Everything I wish I could call you up and tell you.
I key in only to delete because I realize even if the message got delivered whats change us.
I would to tell you Im happy.
That I met someone who is as good of a man as you are maybe even better.
Maybe I had to lose you to get that.
And thats what hurts.
Sometimes I look at him and I wonder will he ever know me the way you did?
Will he ever take the time to learn every curve and every sharp edge?
Will he be able to read the things I dont say and know to ask if Im okay?
Will he ask about my parents and work to build relationships with them?
Will he grab my hand when Im nervous?
Will he hold me close and tell me hes proud of me?
I dont want him to be youbut there were parts of you I loved so deeply.
Parts of you that changed every expectation I had in others after knowing you.
But part of me still misses you even as I watch myself fall for someone new.
That was never us.
Wed never tiptoe around what to say and when to say it.
We were the talks at 2AM.
Making each other better and believing in the other person more than ourselves sometimes.
We were every first conversation in the day never running out of things to say.
And now we cant even say hello without it being awkward.
I knew even before you left how much it was gonna hurt to see you go.
Ive moved on and I dont miss you like I used you but I have my moments.
Moments where I want to tell you things.
Moments where I realize sometimes the people you are closest to are the ones you grow farthest apart from.
The words I love you carelessly slipped out of my mouth but I meant every word of it.
And I would not take it back even if I could.
You taught me what it was like to love again and for that Ill always be grateful for you.
Sometimes I wonder if you miss me too.
Are there books you wish you could share?
Songs where my memory stays with you?
I hope I made you better.
And I hope youre happy.
I look at my reflection and I see parts of you there embedded within me.
And maybe thats what its about taking someone with you even long after they are gone.
