Is he someone you want to procreate with?
Is he somewhat attractive?
Do your friends like him?
Photo byRaissa Lara Lütolf (-Fasel)onUnsplash
Or perhaps you havent found the one and have instead focused on building your career and interesting life experiences.
This precious gift of awareness is rarely granted to people in their twenties.
Or worse, they fall into the narrative that being single in your late thirties is a bad thing.
Your grandmothers worst nightmare!
Awareness is a result of wisdom, life experiences, failures, and successes.
If were paying attention, we are gaining awareness in every situation.
And awareness can lead to great dating power!
(I challenge us all to ponder the thought of a good man also looking for a good woman.
There are these magical, sparkly purple unicorns out there, ladies.
Dont believe everything youre told!
Her guard is upway up.
Through the roof up.
So is her air of desperation, need, and conditioned disappointment.
At this stage of the game, honesty is your best policy.
The jig is up, so to speak.
And very much single.
To show up fully and authentically and allow yourself to be seen.
You dont have to mold yourself to fit anyone elses visions or standards.
Your desires will either align or they wont, and you will know that early on.
It is that simple.
The options that dating presents are endless opportunities for self-reflection and growth.
The guy youre on a date with seems great, but he lives in another state.
Does that truth fit into your lifestyle or the lifestyle you wish to create?
Whether or not you continue to play is then up to you.
The golden opportunities for self-actualization and empowerment are abound.
That said, this is probably a good time to remind ourselves to keep an open mind.
There is a difference between having standards and being too rigid for our own good.
The older we get, the more stuck in our ways we become.
Keep an open mind.
There are times to compromise and times to stay fixed.
You like coffee, but your potential partner likes tea?
Not ideal, but not a dealbreaker.
You believe in monogamy and your date rants about the benefits of an open relationship?
Youre free to say thanks but no thanks.
Taking it to the sheets can be scary.
It can also be thrilling and mind-blowingly amazing.
We are not 23, and hopefully we have shed some early created judgements about sex.
We are all adults here.
We are fully capable of making decisions about what we want and expect for our bodies.
And if something works for you, Mazel Tov!
There is no need to pretend.
This isnt anyones first time at the rodeo.
But it doesnt have to be that way.
you’re able to choose your reality; you’re able to choose your truth.
You have the opportunity to put your amazing-ness out there and let your light shine in all its glory.
Your light is not for everyone, but who doesnt know this as we get closer to 40?
And who still gives a shit?
We know better by now.
And when we know better, we do better.
Youre able to do YOU better.
You will not settle.
You have come too far.
