Real friends see each other in the shit and dark and areas they dont want others to see.
They see it and say, I love you, you freak.
By
Updated 3 months ago,January 28, 2025
I was sitting in the DMV absolutely miserable.
There used to be this show,Reaper, that portrayed the DMV as a literal portal to Hell.
I am not entirely convinced that its fictional.
I mean, if the shoe fits, or whatever.
I live-tweeted my boredom.
As I took a swan dive into pure delirium, my tweets got weirder and weirder.
I think I pitched a TV show revolving around getting locked inside the DMV for 24 hours.
…Actually, not much has changed since then.
But one girl responded to my tweets with gifs and even funnier jokes.
There was an instant witty banter.
She pinged, I ponged.
I dont even remember when I followed her account back.
Or when I made the jump to directly messaging her.
But in that dreadful DMV, I remember laughing.
I remember thinking,this girl is someone I could get along with.
Kendra and I did exactly what parents tell their kids NOT to do: we became friends online.
Here we were, actual strangers, texting all the time, sharing intimate details about our lives.
Yes, yes, theres a way to be safe online.
And yes, lets keep kids from chatting up randos with usernames like BigMikeluvsB00bs.
But sometimes you meet your people in unexpected ways.
Sometimes you find your tribe through a blue screen.
The first time I met Kendra was in a Seattle airport.
We had the added security of knowing this wasnt a Catfish thing.
We would Snapchat and even Facetimed a few times.
We knew the other wasreal.
But that doesnt account for in person vibes.
It was a looming question.Will I actually like this person as much as I think I do?
The answer was a giant, neon lettered Y-E-S.
We hugged and didnt stop talking the entire night.
And thats how you know youve found one of your people.
Kendra and I have hung out together in person five times.
And you know what?
I trust her more than some people Ive gone to school with for years.
People Ive looked straight in the eye day after day.
She has my back with such a loyalty and ferocity.
She boasts about her hard exterior, but shes actually one of the kindest people Ive ever met.
When she cares, she CARES.
Its one of her most beautiful qualities.
Even when she thinks it isnt.
It so, so is.
Kendra has always encouraged my growth.
Shes never made me feel bad about being who I am or struggling or texting back the wrong men.
Shes never asked me to be less or more or chameleon into a more palatable version of myself.
She loves me for me.
And I know, thats a cringe sentence.
And I feel the same way about her.
Because real friends see each other in the shit and dark and areas they dont want others to see.
They see it and say, I love you, you freak.
And thats how you know a friendship is going to keep growing.
Thats how you know a friendship is in it for the long-run.
I havent met a lot of people like Kendra.
Shes confident, extroverted, seems ready at the drop of a hat to take on the world.
But shes also so goddamn human.
She compares herself to others.
She wonders if shell ever be enough.
Shes funny and witty and sarcastic.
But theres a gentleness in her that she tries to keep hidden.
Her and that big, big, BIG heart.
Shes not going to write you a poem.
But shes going to show up.
And shes going to be there.
And shes going to send you a bottle of wine when youre having a shit day.
She is incredibly thoughtful.
Kendra is someone I look up to.
Kendra is someone I respect.
Kendra is someone I love making dumbass videos with.
Or instagram posts with.
Or just like, do creative weird ~~internet~~* shit with.
But damn, I am so glad the stars aligned.
Happy birthday, Kendra.
Thank you for being in my life.
I am better just by knowing you.
