I want you to know I would do things differently now.
It really was me.
The only real cliche here is me.
James Harris
Imthatgirl one with a twisted list so high.
I can check off having terrible taste in men.
Paint you a picture of my past, walk you through my sordid history with darkness.
James Harris
But the truth is none of it matters.
I just am this way.
Ive always been drawn to things that arent good for me.
More than that, I really am a masochist.
In every way it’s possible for you to think of, emotionally even.
The thing is you could have been very good for me.
I knew it then.
I must admit, I regret not letting you in.
I regret doing everything I possibly could to push you away and not let you get close to me.
I regret not seeing a good thing when it was right in front of me.
Today theres a small aching in some deep part of me that wonderswhat if.
Today I regret not giving you a chance.
You were so authentically kind to me that it made me afraid.
You always knew the right things to say.
You said things like hey gorgeous and I miss you beautiful.
You had a genuine desire to see me and spend time with me.
You saw more in me than just the darkness.
You saw more than any guy ever did.
You saw me as more than just a girl with a body.
You wanted to touch me, to reach me, but not just in a physical sense.
You wanted to know me.
You saw me as not just a woman, but as a person.
I know you probably wouldnt have ever done a thing to hurt me.
I remember you telling me, all I want to do is you smile.
I should have let you.
I wonder if I would be smiling now.
I wonder what we would be doing together tonight.
I want you to know I would do things differently now.
I would have never hurt you.
Youre one hell of a guy.
I really meant it.
It really wasnt you.
It really was me.
What happened had nothing to do with your shortcomings but with mine.
And today, all I can hope is that someone like you once again comes my way.
