By
Updated 11 months ago,June 11, 2024
This is my last letter to you.
I have never known a love like ours.
It is probably the deepest love I have ever felt for anyone.
Joyce Huis
It is also the most painful.
I realize I dressed our relationship to be something that it wasnt.
I understand I cant expect you to change, I understand who you are.
Joyce Huis
I dont feel as though I am yours and I dont think I really ever was.
I still would have, if things were different.
I think our spiritual differences also play a role.
I realize I scared you off from the beginning with my soulmate speech.
I truly believed you were my soulmate and that you just didnt know it yet.
How psycho does that sound now?
I honestly feel on a soul level that I have I have loved to the moon and back.
I even went so far to tell myself that this relationship was about showing me how to love unconditionally.
The first three months of our relationship was amazing.
I wish things could have been different.
We did have something, though.
You need a woman who can be so independent that you coexist in harmony.
I unfortunately am not that person.
I have tried to reach out to you so many times.
So much of me wants to wait it out, till you come around.
I honestly feel like you never will.
God knows I wanted you to let me in.
I know you will be ok.
I can only hope that you felt something for me.
That I brought you some happiness in the time we were together.
I feel as though this is the best decision for us.
You may be relieved, I dont know.
I am sorry that this wasnt enough.
I tried my best to make us work.
It was just a balance we could not get right.
I wish you all the happiness in the world.
This is really hard for me.
I thought I would spend the rest of my life with you.
kindly look after yourself, stay true to who you are, stay as driven and motivated.
You inspired me so much to be better.
I hope you draw nothing but strength in this to go on.
Thank you for everything you have done for our relationship.
It wasnt all bad.
The cups of coffee we have shared, the watermelon, and the trips to the mall.
It wasnt all bad, we had some good times.
Thank you for that.
I dont think I ever will.Goodbye.
It has been eight months since I wrote the above letter.
We have officially called it quits, as a direct result of built up sadness and love induced hysteria.
At first, I felt as though I had got what I wanted, to be free.
Although inside it is a constant battle within.
Constant rumination of past events have me analyzing practically every thought.
He seems completely fine.
How do I separate myself from these emotions that bash me down each time I get up?
I dont know how many times I can pick myself up from this emotional turmoil I am going through.
I realize that my insecurities have welcomed my worst fears.
How does one build their self-confidence up when it has seen more strikes than a bowling alley?
