This isnt fair to either of us anymore.
By
Updated 2 months ago,March 4, 2025
I dont think I can do this anymore.
The constant push and pull.
Photo byErik LucateroonUnsplash
The waiting by the phone, willing your name to pop up on my screen.
I cant keep my anxiety under control anymore.
I spend my days afraid of you, so worried about my every word and move.
I cant believe I have become this desperate again.
I give and I give and I give, and I am empty.
You are not the same person that I first met.
You are no longer interested in how my day went or what Im currently writing.
I promised myself that I would never put myself in this situation again.
You pushed and pushed until our friendship became something more.
And yet, you have always made it clear that you would never actually be interested in dating me.
Tell me, what happens then?
Will you disappear as quickly as you came into my life?
How could I have been so naive to think that anything real could ever exist between us?
I told myself that I would be your comfort so you wouldnt have to weather your storm alone.
Did I learn nothing from my time as the darknesshisheart needed?
A relationship should not create fear or anxiety.
A relationship should not leave you crying yourself to sleep.
A real relationship solves problems when they are created; it shouldnt just amplify them.
Someone once told me that they had to ghost me because they liked me too much.
At the time, I was outraged.
I thought their statement was ridiculous and heartless.
How could you abandon someone you supposedly care for so much?
I think I understand now.
Because I can tell you that it is definitely notthis.
Why cant I just let you go?
