Every day, smile.
Even when it hurts.
When they ask you whats wrong tell them youre fine.
Sophia Sinclair
Pour a glass of Merlot, never Cabernet (not anymore).
Fill up the bath, dont think of him when you listen toThe xx.
Remind yourself he didnt come to collect the ashes.
Theres nothing to build something from.
Remind yourself he built a home somewhere else.
Ruin your poems by making them about him.
Write him an email, but never click send.
Let it sit in your drafts.
Write him a letter.
Tear up the paper.
Burn it in the sink.
Turn on the faucet and send it down the garbage disposal.
Go as long as eight days without thinking about him.
Turn off the movie with the main characters that made you think of you and him.
Go back to only watching horror films.
Download Bumble, Tinder, and Hinge.
Match with men and women, make plans, but never follow through.
Delete every dating app, theyre not for you, anyway.
Every day, smile.
Even when it hurts.
When they ask you whats wrong tell them youre fine.
Dont tell them that amidst all the chaos, you still think of him.
Dont tell them you know hed make it better.
Dont tell them he made you forget every atrocity in your world.
On your birthday, unblock his number.
But dont text him.
Dont ever text him.
Block his number again.
Dont put up lights during the holiday season because itll only make you think of that Christmas.
Avoid your hometown that day.
Go on another date.
Whisper Spanish into their ear at the end of the night.
This is something he doesnt get to keep.
Wake up from the fifth dream youve had in which he proposes to her.
Treat it like a reality.
Throw away the corset you wore to his apartment the first night he told you he loved you.
Go out and buy a new one.
Tell yourself youll wear this one for somebody else.
Wear it around the house, instead.
Touch yourself, but never think of him.
Fix your hair, loose tousled curls, spray it down.
Take your time doing your makeup.
Dont tear up putting on the lipstick he said he liked seeing smeared on his skin.
Mascara and liquid eyeliner dont come cheap.
Look in the mirror all dolled up in your new lingerie.
Never send them to him.
Put on heels and a dress.
Go out, but never to his side of town.
Alone, or otherwise.
Just hurt until you dont anymore.
Miss him, think of him until you dont.
Whatever you do, dont pick up your phone.
