There are scars from the past that tell stories you dont tell to just anyone.
Its the bruises you hide.
Its the mark you claim were caused because you were clumsy and fell.
Mart Production
Its having to actually make an effort to hide the reality of what the relationship actually is or was.
But emotional abuse isnt as easy to spot.
Emotional abuse messes with your head.
The red flags go unnoticed to average people and sometimes even to the individual being emotionally abused.
They dont realize there is an issue with how theyve been treated when it might be all they know.
Rather the perpetrator of emotional abuse uses emotion as his/her weapon of choice.
When shes been emotionally abused she wont trust herself.
Its going to take time for her to trust you.
When she finally meets someone decent, shes going to question the relationship and you.
And shes going to question if she even deserves it.
She might push you away.
People reject what is unfamiliar to them.
So give her time to come around at her own pace.
Be the example she compares others too not just another reason she distrusts people.
Shes always going to blame herself for things.
In emotionally abusive relationships the victim is always the one at fault.
And whether shes to blame or not she will always take full responsibility for everything thats happened.
Youll find her apologizing for things that she shouldnt be saying sorry for.
To her, its easier that way but know when to sit her down and admit she wasnt wrong.
Know when to take responsibility for your own mistakes and be the one saying sorry.
She may not be the most confident.
Its the flaw someone pointed out constantly.
She never feels like shes enough.
Shes always going to try too hard.
Shes always going to out do you.
Shes always going to take things to the next level.
Shes programmed to constantly try unbelievably hard.
But pulling her aside and explaining she doesnt need to do these things is an important conversation.
But she wont understand because trying too hard comes very naturally to her.
Shes going to expect a lot of fights and you leaving.
They will never take the blame fully.
In a healthy relationship talking through a problem and coming out with a solution will be unfamiliar to her.
Its so much more.
And shell put herself down.
When someone has put you down enough the abuser doesnt have to anymore.
It then transitions into self-destruction of her repeating every negative thing shes heard.
Dont look down on her for a lack of confidence or things that werent within her control.
Just build her up from there.
Shell struggle in asking for what she wants in the relationship.
Shell struggle with communication.
She might bottle things up and avoid talking about things.
As if silence will avoid fights.
In a healthy relationship that will be her biggest obstacle to overcome learning how to effectively communicate issues.
Youll realize how fragile and sensitive and emotional she is.
Shes learned empathy the hard way.
Shes learned how to hide things most people dont have to even endure.
Shes learned about unhealthy and bad relationships.
What youll see is someone so beautiful you fail to understand how anyone could mistreat her.
Shes stronger than shell ever give herself credit for.
