And when youve invested enough time and energy into someone you dont want to be wrong about them.
You dont want to accept you wasted time and energy in someone who was a lost cause.
It takes everything in her to walk away.
God & Man
But once she does its a completely different person who comes out of the relationship as a result.
Walking away might seem like the easy part but it isnt.
It is everything after that which is hard.
God & Man
Understand shes not weak for staying in it.
Shes not weak for being with someone who didnt deserve her and manipulated her over time.
When a toxic person doesnt have control of parts of their own life they try and control others.
Shes strong for enduring it as long as she did.
Theres strength in believing in someone so much you love them through their worst parts.
Theres strength in hoping they stay their best self all the time.
But toxic people have two very opposite sides to them.
Understand shes forgotten what she deserves.
Its going to throw her off entirely when you start treating her normally.
So you gotta teach her how a real man treats someone.
Constantly show her this is what you deserve and everything in the past was something you didnt.
Understand her expectations are very low.
Shes expecting everything to end badly.
Shes not setting the bar high or getting her hopes up at all.
Shes just going through the motions checking her back because shes learned she has to.
Simply to protect herself from getting hurt again.
She changed because that was her only chance of overcoming it and walking away.
Understand she doesnt trust you or herself at all.
Its something that will take time and patience.
Every move you make, everything that happens, you gotta follow her lead in it.
Shes scared and doesnt trust people.
Thats going to take time, to build back up.
Understand shes going to doubt and overthink everything.
Overthinking and those red flags in her head are there to protect her.
Shes not going to trust you at all at first.
And when you get too close shell push you away.
She has walls higher than anyone.
And there are very few that get past it.
Just let her come back around.
Shes used to that and she doesnt respond well to it.
Understand shes going to think theres some catch.
While youre simply treating her the way you were taught to treat women, to her its unusual.
In the past, kindness has come bearing favors and used as blackmail.
So the concept of being nice because she deserves it is foreign to her.
Teach her she deserves genuine kindness just because.
Understand that she thinks fighting is normal.
Shes going to anticipate fighting.
Shes going to expect things to end only to begin again.
She expects running in circles.
That first fight shes going to expect you to take off running and its her fault.
Had you done this correctly I wouldnt have yelled as much as I did.
Had you not acted that way I wouldnt have gone after you.
The common phrase of you made me do it, justifies mistreatment.
And will apologize even when shes not wrong.
If you guys do fight, shes always going to be the one to take the heat and apologize.
She just wants to the fight to end and shell do anything to ensure that.
Understand shes going to try really hard all the time.
Its led her to think to gain anyones interest shes gonna have to try really hard.
The first is nothing they ever did was good enough so they had to try hard.
But doesnt expect you to do the same.
She doesnt do things in hopes it comes back to her.
She does things because making someone else happy brings her happiness.
She will open up to you about her past.
Eventually, she will trust you enough to tell you everything.
Even though shes really nervous to.
She considers vulnerability weakness.
But shell tell you these things and not even get worked up about it.
And itll be there you fall in love with her.
Youll fall in love with her for the person she became as a result of all of this.
