What happened to you wasn’t fair.
What happened to your family wasn’t fair.
Nothing about your death was fair.
Twenty20 / genna.contento
I can hold back the tears and accept that youre gone.
About how it was your time and how everything happens for a reason.
But sometimes, thatsilver liningsattitude fades away and all I can feel is anger.
Im sorry that I cant be strong all the time.
That there are days when I question my faith.
Days when I hate the world and every person inside of it.
Twenty20 / genna.contento
Days when Im bitter about the way life turned out.
Im sorry that I cant walk around with unflinching hope when I know how shitty this world is.
Im sorry Im not perfect.
Im sorry I carry so much anger inside.
Im pissed, because you left your family behind.
You left people who still needed your love, your voice, your hugs, your kisses.
People who cared about you more than they cared about themselves.
People who would do anything to have one more minute with you.
Because the goodness in your heart should have earned you more days, months, years.
Im pissed, because you deserved better.
You deserved to celebrate more milestones.
You deserved to see the people around you grow up.
Im pissed, because its not fair.
That sounds whiny to say, childish, but its the truth.
What happened to you wasnt fair.
What happened to your family wasnt fair.
Nothing about your death was fair.
And I hate that I miss you, because I shouldnt have to.
I should be able to call you up.
I should be able to knock on your door.
I should be able to see you face-to-face anytime I want.
You should still be here, right now, sending me texts to ask how Ive been doing.
You should still be here, right now, giving me a reason to laugh instead of cry.
You should still be here, right now, alive and well.
I will always believe that there was some sort of mistake, that you didnt deserve it.
I will always believe that you deserved so much more.
